Know what you're thinking.. time for a juicy story. Sorry to say but no, no juicy story coming.. not yet anyway. just had a need to express some things and since i know already there is going to be a part two i might as well prepare for that, right?
So, anal play.. no secret that its something alot of people are into, and enjoy. But so far i havent been one of them. When i started explosing the D/s side of me it was a hard limit but as we all know those are subject to change and so has mine. It moved from a hard, to a soft and now even if it still scares me some it excites me at the same time. However, yes i'm still an anal virgin (feels like i'm the last one in the world allthou i know i'm not). Some days ago i was surfing around on a adult toystore online and was sharing the funny, weird and interesting things with Mr Evil. It was a fun conversation and the subject of anal come up, once again (it has a million times). He thinks i'm going to enjoy it and we started talking about anal toys. However the conversation ended (why i cant remember) and we moved on to other things.
Last night i was once again surfing on that very same website, wanting to get something new.. of course i asked Mr Evil if there was something on there that He thought i should get. Not sure i should have laughs but the list soon came with His ideas. So, even if it wasnt a direct order from His side its now ordered. Set of handcuffs, gag (He gave me a choice of this or sending me to the hardware store to make my own) and.. yes of course, a anal toy.
i'm nervous, excited, scared... all at once. Mr Evil even made a comment about how i'm not allowed to cum until it arrived in the mail either. MEAN! (He's called Mr Evil for a reason thou right?). Not totally sure on how serious that was but, not a good idea to ask.. Not right now, dont want to give Him ideas. i was however alloweed to cum last night before bed and OMG it was painful.. and so nice all at once. Had to bite my lip hard not to wake the whole building. And, i did promise to be Daddy's good girl ALL week cause of it. Sinking deeper into that side of our relationship by the minute..
So, there you have it.. part one. my guess is part two will arrive soon after my toy has. Strict orders about not being allowed to play with it without Him being around thou.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Dirty thoughts
As always my mind is spinning with a million thoughts, ideas and fantasies. The latest thing floating around in my head is naughty. Not so much naughty itself but more how to bring ideas or fantasies to your Dom/me that you are embarrased to have. Not sure any of this is making sense but picture this.
You have this idea (or fantasy) thats been playing in your head for awhile and just the fact that its in your mind makes you blush. The thought of admitting to this makes you nauseas and wanting to crawl out of your own skin.What do you do?
Thats whats been playing in my head for awhile, not saying i have any of those "dark" thoughts at the moment but i'm sure i will at some point and it just crossed my mind that i have no idea how to carry myself in a situation like this. Sure, you should and probebly will end up telling your Dom/me but if they arent in to the same thing and it never gets brought up.... Do you tell them? or maybe wait for it to be pulled out of you? if its not a need or desire would not sharing really matter?
i should so not be allowed to think at time laughs so many things play in my mind.. and yes, for the record i'm usually not to keen on exposing my sluttyness to the rest of the world and there for not really one to admit to my more.. kinky sides.
You have this idea (or fantasy) thats been playing in your head for awhile and just the fact that its in your mind makes you blush. The thought of admitting to this makes you nauseas and wanting to crawl out of your own skin.What do you do?
Thats whats been playing in my head for awhile, not saying i have any of those "dark" thoughts at the moment but i'm sure i will at some point and it just crossed my mind that i have no idea how to carry myself in a situation like this. Sure, you should and probebly will end up telling your Dom/me but if they arent in to the same thing and it never gets brought up.... Do you tell them? or maybe wait for it to be pulled out of you? if its not a need or desire would not sharing really matter?
i should so not be allowed to think at time laughs so many things play in my mind.. and yes, for the record i'm usually not to keen on exposing my sluttyness to the rest of the world and there for not really one to admit to my more.. kinky sides.
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Question - What to do when you know you'll fail
Have you ever been given a task knowing right away that its impossible for you to finish to your Dom/me's standards?
Might not be at all what you think.. but.. today i was given the task of making sure Mr Evil doesn't fall asleep. No one out there knows how hard that is when He's tired (its IMPOSSIBLE). There is no way in hell i can do anything else but fail at this task. i did my best for 3 hours before i had to leave and leave Him to His own destiny. Still dont know if He actually managed to stay awake after i left or not but i sure hope so.
Which brings me to my question. Have you ever been given a task knowing you wont be able to finish it?
If Yes, please share what it was.. please?
Might not be at all what you think.. but.. today i was given the task of making sure Mr Evil doesn't fall asleep. No one out there knows how hard that is when He's tired (its IMPOSSIBLE). There is no way in hell i can do anything else but fail at this task. i did my best for 3 hours before i had to leave and leave Him to His own destiny. Still dont know if He actually managed to stay awake after i left or not but i sure hope so.
Which brings me to my question. Have you ever been given a task knowing you wont be able to finish it?
If Yes, please share what it was.. please?
Monday, February 21, 2011
Random thoughts
Today is one of those days when i crave the submissive part of me. Dont get me wrong, i do all the time but today i have this need or maybe its a want. Hard to tell the difference right now.. Anyway, i just wish Master was here.
Masters Bitch just wants to kneel at His feet, curl around them, brush her cheek against His leg and hopefully feel His hand in her hair, looking up to meet His smile as the evening just passes on. Nothing would have to be said, just a random moment infront of the tv.
When those cravings for Master fill me its isnt the sexual moments i need or think about. Its the little things.
Waking up in the middle of the night by Him coming home.
Curling up at His feet
Being allowed on the sofa, with my head in His lap.
Daddy tucking his babygirl in for bed, kissing her goodnight.
Maybe its one of those emotional evenings after all..
Masters Bitch just wants to kneel at His feet, curl around them, brush her cheek against His leg and hopefully feel His hand in her hair, looking up to meet His smile as the evening just passes on. Nothing would have to be said, just a random moment infront of the tv.
When those cravings for Master fill me its isnt the sexual moments i need or think about. Its the little things.
Waking up in the middle of the night by Him coming home.
Curling up at His feet
Being allowed on the sofa, with my head in His lap.
Daddy tucking his babygirl in for bed, kissing her goodnight.
Maybe its one of those emotional evenings after all..
Friday, February 18, 2011
Orgasm control
Its 6.30am on a normal day. The snow is sparkling in the sunlight outside the window,
you can hear your neighbor singing in the shower and you are twisting and turning in bed not
wanting to get up. And there it is.. that sudden urge to touch yourself. But WAIT, that's right.
You can't, you arent allowed to.
Anyone been there?
The thing with orgasm control has always been.. interesting but more lately then before.
Mr Evil has full control over mine, i'm not allowed to touch myself or cum without permission.
One part of me thinks its insane and so wrong to hand over control over something so
personal. The other part of me, love it! Love that someone can have that level of control
and that i'm comfortable and trusting enough to hand it over. Would never ever hand that
level of control over if you didnt trust a person 150% right? It is a very personal thing.
Not even being able to make yourself cum under your own blanket in bed.
Doing something normally not known. But He knows.. He knows His little toy doesnt play
without permission and at the same time, never without His knowledge.
Its odd but in a way it makes me feel loved. His firm grip over a very personal
part of my life, makes me feel so loved.
Anyone out there know what i mean or have i totally lost my mind? laughs.
you can hear your neighbor singing in the shower and you are twisting and turning in bed not
wanting to get up. And there it is.. that sudden urge to touch yourself. But WAIT, that's right.
You can't, you arent allowed to.
Anyone been there?
The thing with orgasm control has always been.. interesting but more lately then before.
Mr Evil has full control over mine, i'm not allowed to touch myself or cum without permission.
One part of me thinks its insane and so wrong to hand over control over something so
personal. The other part of me, love it! Love that someone can have that level of control
and that i'm comfortable and trusting enough to hand it over. Would never ever hand that
level of control over if you didnt trust a person 150% right? It is a very personal thing.
Not even being able to make yourself cum under your own blanket in bed.
Doing something normally not known. But He knows.. He knows His little toy doesnt play
without permission and at the same time, never without His knowledge.
Its odd but in a way it makes me feel loved. His firm grip over a very personal
part of my life, makes me feel so loved.
Anyone out there know what i mean or have i totally lost my mind? laughs.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Punished and Rewarded
Its been a while since i was here last. Mostly cause of RL things getting in the way, such as no internet connection. Sorry pervs out there but dont think my boss would be too happy if she found my internet history packed with kinky, pervy, fetish blogs.
While being off radar for awhile i managed to do things i shouldnt and neglected to show Master the level of attention and respect He deserves. Dont know how many punishments He is actually going to give me but i know of at least two. As much as i enjoy pain there are good kinds of pain and there are bad. Kneeling on rice is a very bad kind of pain, and something Master has done to me a few times. Its one of those things i fear so much that i beg him, really beg him not to do it. i know that punishment is going to come thou and the other day He made me swing by the store and get some. He even made me bring it along to work so that every time i'd open my bag there it was. Just writing about it sends shivers down my spine. The kneeling on it might be yet to come.
This morning before work i got my first (and hopefully last) punishment. Master called me while i was still in bed and made me get up and find a marker. Not the easiest task in the world at the moment but i did find one, a green one. Shivers He then made me write "Bitch will obey Master" all over my body. 100 times to be exact, sending Him pictures of different body parts as it went on. Felt like it would never end. Not the easies thing in the world to find room for 100 sentences like that when you cant write with both hands (right handed). Lost count a few times along the way and ran out of ink in the pen (found a new one) but i did it. The redness of my cheeks wasnt hard to miss and hate to admit it but the wetness of something else wasnt either. Master called me His good little girl and all was good.. or so i thought. BIG Mistake!!!!!
With nipple clamps on He made me press my back against the wall and sink down on my toy that was trapped between my body and the floor. He took total control over my body and orgasm as He started counting down... and just before it got to 0, He stopped. Not having been allowed to cum in days! (only the occational tounching here and there) i was frustrated beyond words. He made me beg, made me beg for the toy.. made me beg for Him to continue counting, made me beg to be allowed to cum. Something not at all hard at this point. God i wanted to cum soooo bad. Must have done something good as He did give permission and finished counting, giving me permission to cum. Dont think i have ever been so thankful.. ever!
My nipples hurt, my pussy and legs did as well. He made me take the clamps off and gave me permission to sink to the floor. From there its a little bit of a cloud.. We talked, laughed and i could tell He was happy smiles Love the sound of Master smiling (Hard to explain how i know but i can hear it in tone of voice and how he says things). At some point i was allowed to jump back in bed. i made sure Master knew just how thankful His little bitch was and judged by the sounds coming from Him, He knew.
Almost ashamed to say but asked Master if i could be greedy and with the clamps back on again, He gave me permission to cum both a second time and a third before i had to jump in the shower and head for work. The words on my body as a reminder of who i belong too and what my motto in life should be.
i was a happy submissive who knew her place when walking to work today.
While being off radar for awhile i managed to do things i shouldnt and neglected to show Master the level of attention and respect He deserves. Dont know how many punishments He is actually going to give me but i know of at least two. As much as i enjoy pain there are good kinds of pain and there are bad. Kneeling on rice is a very bad kind of pain, and something Master has done to me a few times. Its one of those things i fear so much that i beg him, really beg him not to do it. i know that punishment is going to come thou and the other day He made me swing by the store and get some. He even made me bring it along to work so that every time i'd open my bag there it was. Just writing about it sends shivers down my spine. The kneeling on it might be yet to come.
This morning before work i got my first (and hopefully last) punishment. Master called me while i was still in bed and made me get up and find a marker. Not the easiest task in the world at the moment but i did find one, a green one. Shivers He then made me write "Bitch will obey Master" all over my body. 100 times to be exact, sending Him pictures of different body parts as it went on. Felt like it would never end. Not the easies thing in the world to find room for 100 sentences like that when you cant write with both hands (right handed). Lost count a few times along the way and ran out of ink in the pen (found a new one) but i did it. The redness of my cheeks wasnt hard to miss and hate to admit it but the wetness of something else wasnt either. Master called me His good little girl and all was good.. or so i thought. BIG Mistake!!!!!
With nipple clamps on He made me press my back against the wall and sink down on my toy that was trapped between my body and the floor. He took total control over my body and orgasm as He started counting down... and just before it got to 0, He stopped. Not having been allowed to cum in days! (only the occational tounching here and there) i was frustrated beyond words. He made me beg, made me beg for the toy.. made me beg for Him to continue counting, made me beg to be allowed to cum. Something not at all hard at this point. God i wanted to cum soooo bad. Must have done something good as He did give permission and finished counting, giving me permission to cum. Dont think i have ever been so thankful.. ever!
My nipples hurt, my pussy and legs did as well. He made me take the clamps off and gave me permission to sink to the floor. From there its a little bit of a cloud.. We talked, laughed and i could tell He was happy smiles Love the sound of Master smiling (Hard to explain how i know but i can hear it in tone of voice and how he says things). At some point i was allowed to jump back in bed. i made sure Master knew just how thankful His little bitch was and judged by the sounds coming from Him, He knew.
Almost ashamed to say but asked Master if i could be greedy and with the clamps back on again, He gave me permission to cum both a second time and a third before i had to jump in the shower and head for work. The words on my body as a reminder of who i belong too and what my motto in life should be.
i was a happy submissive who knew her place when walking to work today.
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Mixed signals
Lately i've been missing Master a lot more then normal. He keeps asking me if something is wrong, if something out of the ordinary has happened and it hasn't. His little slut has just missed Him more then normal. Its so bad that i see D/s related stuff in everything. Like a episode of "Shit my dad says" i saw a while ago.
Bonnie rings a bell for dinner.
Vince comes rushing in through the door - I heard the bell, everything ok?
Bonnie - I thought it was the dinner bell!
Vince - No hunny, thats a punishment bell, it means come get your spanking.
Bonnie - And you rushed in for that?
Vince - Time with Dad is.. time with Dad.
i do hope you guys can see what i mean by this.. or am i just that twisted?
Bonnie rings a bell for dinner.
Vince comes rushing in through the door - I heard the bell, everything ok?
Bonnie - I thought it was the dinner bell!
Vince - No hunny, thats a punishment bell, it means come get your spanking.
Bonnie - And you rushed in for that?
Vince - Time with Dad is.. time with Dad.
i do hope you guys can see what i mean by this.. or am i just that twisted?
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